Notes: When waiting for labour feels hard
Inspired by a question asked on our stories just the other day and echoed in our own hearts as we support a number of expectant mothers and birthing people right now. It felt right to gather it all together in one place. Something you can read, return to, and lean into in those moments where the waiting feels long, and you need a steady hand or a soft reminder.
Below are some seriously hot tips from the wise and grounded Beth, who has supported over 100 births and continues to hold space in these liminal moments day in and day out.
The Question: 41+5 and still no baby? Feeling Antsy.
“Oh mate, how exciting — and I feel ya! OK, so I’m going to give you some things that you could do, but I also want you to know that you don’t need to do anything — and that this baby will come at the exact right time (which I know can be tricky to sit with, especially if you’re birthing within the system).
If it feels right to you to try some things and you think it might help your headspace, here are some options:
Complete the Miles Circuit and/or Spinning Babies Three Balances (Google them!) to do what you can to ensure bub is in an optimal position. Curb walking can also help these little humans get their head settled well into the pelvis.
Acupuncture. This has incredible evidence backing it up.
If you’ve got a breast pump, pop it on each side for a good 30 minutes each. If no breast pump — have a really good play with your nipples!
Speaking of... sex or self-pleasure. It’s all about creating that sweet, sweet oxytocin.
Have a listen to some guided meditations that check in on any fears you might be holding. Even without a meditation, sit in some quiet and let yourself feel whatever you’re feeling. Perhaps write down whatever thoughts come up? Have a good cry if you need to. Cry releases are soooo beneficial!
You’ve got this, mama. You’ll be meeting your baby so soon.”— @bethburkedoula
Everyone will move through this liminal space at the very end of pregnancy in their own way. What surfaces may be emotional, physical, spiritual — or all of it. But if we can meet ourselves with tenderness and presence, if we can tend to what's arising with love and compassion, we can’t go wrong.
Here are a few little additions I’d love to offer when you’re deep in the waiting:
Journal or voice note. What’s coming up for you? Say it aloud, talk to a friend, or name it in writing. Witnessing and tend to yourself.
Create a reflective space. Whether it’s five quiet minutes in the car or a cosy corner at home with a candle, music, or a warm tea. Find a small sanctuary to connect inward.
Speak to your baby and listen too. They can hear you. No one is more attuned to them than you are.
Make plans that are fun and joyful. Especially ones that are also about connecting with partners or existing siblings. Move with the existing rhythm of life, you’ll forget about the waiting because you’ll be too busy living.
Be with what is, in the moment or in the feeling. Know it is not right or wrong, it just is.
And finally, a poem from me, written for a mother I’m supporting as she waits with an open heart for her baby to come earthside.
A Sacred Pause
Your body knows the way, and it feels your worries whirl.
It whispers with your baby, in a language older than words.
Can you listen closely? Can you close your eyes.
There it is, they have asked you, for
a sacred pause.
You are not stuck.
You are not late.
You are not lost.
You are exactly where
you
need to be.
It is all unfolding, becoming, undone.
There is a weight in the waiting,
tiny shifts, cellular, unseen.
Breathe in, breathe out, be here.
For this, your sacred pause.
Listen, feel, surrender.
You are closer than you know.
So whether you are 38 weeks or nearing 42 weeks, this is your birth, your story and you’ve got this.
With you in waiting,
Josie x
